Babysitter Pageant

When I first needed to hire a babysitter I promised myself that my main goal would be that ugly would be a definite requirement. Lord knows there is no better recipe for disaster then a hot women half your age taking energetic care of your kids. Reality has played some cosmic joke on me because the women that end up coming to interview are starting to look like they escaped from the friggin Miss Universe Pageant. It is very depressing. Hi..."I am completely gorgeous, I have no stretch marks, speak five languages and I can chase your kids for 5 hours". "Do you think your husband would enjoy having me around?" YIKES!!! Where have all the sweet and nasty looking babysitters gone? Is this some cosmic joke?